the definition of the idiom “means to an end” is as follows:

something that you are not interested in but that you do because it will help you to achieve something else

i could honestly say before this my interest in prayer was slight. i mean i might have said i was interested in prayer, but my behavior for the long past has shown differently. but if i have for 26 days (+/- 4 or 5 days) engaged in something that i wasn’t interested in, what is the ’something else’ it is helping me to achieve?

as phil has so brilliantly wrote lately, “so (?)”

throughout our 4 week journey, I have been consistently asking myself the question, “Why Pray?”. at one point i wrote:

“I guess that’s what I’m hoping for through this month. Not just that prayer would be something I check off my list of things to do, or even to see ‘things happen’, but simply to see if consistent prayer might draw me closer to Jesus in a new way.”

essentially a more intimate life with god is the ’something else’ i am hoping to bring about my doing something i wasn’t really interested in (prayer) before this.

so the question 26 days into this is, am i at the end? has prayer brought about a more close relationship with god?

yes…and no.

sometimes i have felt closer to god and sometimes not.

but what i’m learning is that prayer is good, and prayer is powerful, but it’s not the end. prayer isn’t the end goal. giving 12 minutes of my day to some time in prayer is not the end to which i am striving.

if my end goal is a greater intimacy with god, then prayer has been good, but only as one piece of a larger puzzle.

prayer alone. worship alone. conversation alone. scripture alone. none of these things alone get me to the end.

somehow i have to find a way to integrate many things into my life together to reach the end.

so i’ll keep praying… but hopefully with a commitment to developing some other positive habits into my life that together might help me get closer to this thing i define as ‘closeness’.